Why now?

The look that accompanied the caption mentioned below  – Eyes: combo of neutral Anastasia Beverly Hills ultra matte shadows and a NYX Cosmetics single teal metallic eyeshadow (don’t know the name – sorry!) and waterproof eyeliner in Aqua Green – Lips: Kylie Cosmetics x Kim Kardashian West in Kimberly

Lately, I’ve felt a little unfulfilled. Don’t get me wrong; I’m lucky – very lucky – to have a career, hobbies, interests, a boyfriend, family, and friends that make my life full and my evenings and weekends busy. I love being on the go. I thrive on deadlines and commitments. I’m so thankful for the people and activities that fill my Google calendar. I’m sometimes even guilty of using “busy” as an excuse to have a messy apartment, get less sleep than I need, etc. (Remember that whole being real thing? Exhibit A.)

The timing doesn’t seem right to add another thing to my plate. But, really, does/will it ever? So, why now? Why can’t I put off attempting to build something (my personal brand, a following, a…I don’t know yet) any longer?

I want to do…something. Something creative. Something I’m passionate about. I’m a writer who misses writing and feels like she has something to say. I’m not a photographer, but I find enjoyment in taking photos of beauty products I’ve tried and makeup looks I’ve created and finding the perfect words and hashtags to post on Instagram to not only convey my thoughts but also to garner likes and follows. For the past probably year or so, I’ve been wondering how to turn my wants into actions. Check out this caption on a makeup look I posted on Instagram in late June:

Per the suggestion of several people I know and trust, I’m toying with the idea of attempting to build my reputation as a beauty influencer. I’m no makeup artist or pro by any means, but I’m a self-proclaimed beauty enthusiast and product junkie, and I love trying new things. I’m not quite ready to take the YouTube plunge, so I thought I’d start with some Instagram story GRWM (get ready with me) posts. Thoughts? Would you watch? Any words of advice or encouragement? Let a girl know! It’s a little scary, so anything helps.

I still feel that way – not quite ready to take the YouTube plunge, but ready to start putting myself out there on Instagram and with this blog. It IS scary to be that vulnerable. But, if doing improv has taught me anything, it’s that the magic happens when you’re outside of your comfort zone. It’s that saying “yes” and following the energy results in something different – usually better – than what you had planned.

I recently read a post about how to start a blog on a blog that I’ve followed for about a year now. I’ve had blogs over the years, and my day job has me in WordPress working on clients’ blogs constantly, so that’s nothing new to me. What struck me most was this: Start your website and blog as though you already have thousands of followers. You want to create content you are proud of and is already at the caliber you want to produce later down the road. This means your content, your site, your photos… if you start at a 10, you already are appealing to people who are seeing your name and site for the first time regardless of numbers. It’s sort of like a “fake it til you make it” mentality. (Any start-up will tell you that this is how to do it well. Start running the race how you want to be in 2-5 years.)”

I mean, DUH! So obvious, but such a difficult thing to do. Sure, I have a long way to go (especially when it comes to photos and videos), but what’s holding me back? I have the itch, and all signs point to start now, so I need to honor that energy and jump in and do my best work to build something I’m proud of. If anything, it will (hopefully) be a fun, creative, fulfilling endeavor.

So, this is me, putting myself out there and jumping in – right into the deep end. The Instagram posts are easy (I hope you’ll follow along!); it’s the videos that are intimidating. But, I’m faking it until I make it with my makeshift filming set up, $10 tripod from Target, and a reservation in an upcoming iMovie class at a local Apple store. It’s happening, guys. I’m so excited to see what’s to come. My first official GRWM will be coming soon!


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